Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Atlantis





Our potatoes have been in the earth for four days now. The seedlings are planted on the first of April, pending rain, and are tenderly cared for by our gentle farmers. The name of the potatoes we use is Atlantis which I think is fitting.

11,000 years ago, and that's quite a lot of years ago, Poseidon ruled the sea. I know what you're thinking. "Poseidon was a Greek God, making him a myth." Well, I like myths and choose to believe as many as possible including the one that states that men are intrinsically kind and selfless. While I've never met such a man, I choose to believe he may indeed exist. And so it is with Poseidon, who was a bit of a romantic. He defied Zeus, the scary thunderbolt wielding King of the Mythical Gods, by falling in love with a mortal. Her name was Cleito and apparently she was something special.

Poseidon was crazy about her and the seas remained turbulent and dark until she agreed to marry him. Big mistake for Cleito. While she did love Poseidon she became pregnant straight away and birthed the first set of five twins. Yes, poor mortal Cleito had ten children, all boys. Poseidon created a magnificent castle for her on the top of an island in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. They named their little cozy get-a-way Atlantis.

While Poseidon oversaw the building of a temple to house his bigger than life gold statue of himself in a shiny chariot pulled by giant winged horses (that century's equivalent to the big trucks we see so often crowding our highways while making silent statements about the driver's (blush) dimensions.) Cleito was busy raising a family and running a nation.

Her first-born twin son became the King of Atlantis. You've probably heard of him, Atlas. He's the big strong man who is always pictured holding the Earth on his ample shoulders. Knowing he had nine younger brothers at home it makes sense Atlas grew up to be a show-off over-achiever. Typical first-born.

Things went swell for the island. It became a commercial center of trade and attracted all the beautiful people. Well, Zeus, bless his heart, got jealous. You know how those Greek God's were. Anytime mortals started really enjoying themselves out came the thunderbolts. So after a big late night party on Olympus one morning, Zeus, a little hung over from too much nectar watched the happy islanders from his favorite brown recliner and it made him mad. He aimed his mighty thunderbolt and ZAP! KAPOWIE! Atlantis was crushed and fell to the bottom of the sea. The huge gold statue of Poseidon still rests there, under the water waiting to be discovered and enjoyed.

Lucky for our Atlantis potatoes that they remain under the earth for only sixty days or so before they are dug up and bathed for their trip to the factory where they are continuously cooked, then packaged and sent to your favorite shop, waiting to be discovered and enjoyed.


Happy discovery, Abigail, Your Potato Chip Girl

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